


Under the Mountain

by octopus_fool



Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-11
Updated: 2016-02-11
Packaged: 2018-05-19 16:09:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,019
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5973616
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/octopus_fool/pseuds/octopus_fool
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There is one thing in Erebor that Bilbo just can't get the hang of...</p>
            </blockquote>





	Under the Mountain

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Small_Hobbit](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Small_Hobbit/gifts).



Bilbo cursed. He had been so sure he was on the right way to the kitchens this time. He had counted to turns and recited the path Dori had described to him again and again under his breath as he braved the paths above the deep chasms. It was all to no avail: Bilbo was lost again. He glared at the old cave-in in front of him, just one corner from where he had thought the kitchens would be. 

“String beans, parsnips and pig cress! They should put up signs!” He glanced at the chasm beside him. “And railings,” he added darkly.

“Are you lost again, Mister Boggins?” Fíli’s voice drifted down to him. He had taken to using the wrong name Kíli had invented in jest.

Bilbo looked up to see him standing two levels above him, looking down as though the possibility of tumbling down to a painful death in the shadows didn’t even occur to him. “What does it look like to you? This mountain is a menace.”   
He hated the fact that even though Fíli and the other younger dwarves had never been in Erebor either, they had no problems navigating around it.

“Where were you headed?”

“The kitchens.”

“Go back the way you came and take the first turn left. I’ll meet you at the stairs there, the kitchens are almost on my way.”

That was a lie, Bilbo knew. If he remembered correctly, the cave-in the dwarves were currently clearing was on the other side of the mountains from the kitchen. He suddenly felt guilty for being slightly rude to Fíli. He hadn’t been the idiot who had planned Erebor’s layout after all. 

 

Bilbo’s mood had not really improved a few days later. He still kept getting lost constantly and it was starting to annoy him.   
He was just about to leave the small room that temporarily served as the royal chambers and meet Bifur and Bombur to plan a small garden on the southern slope of Erebor, when Thorin stopped him.

“Wait, Bilbo, there is something I wanted to talk to you about.”

“Can it wait? I have to leave if I want to have even a remote chance at being on time for my meeting with Bifur and Bombur.” The time Bilbo had estimated he would need to get to his destination was ridiculously long, but since Thorin didn’t know exactly when he was meeting them, he didn’t need to know that.

Thorin nodded. “I will try to be brief. Fíli told me you were still getting lost. That’s what I wanted to talk to you about.”

“Well it’s not my fault that this nightmare of a mountain is impossible to navigate. Even the goblin tunnels were more logical,” Bilbo said a little more sharply than he had intended. 

Thorin seemed to shrink. “Do you… did you change your mind about staying in Erebor?” 

Bilbo stared at him. “No. Of course not, no. You belong here in your mountain and I want to be where you are. I’ve told you so before, more times than I can remember. It is just beyond frustrating that I still cannot find the way even after two months. Everybody else stopped getting lost after the first week here.”

Thorin, who had breathed a sigh of relief when Bilbo declared he hadn’t changed his mind about staying in Erebor, looked at the floor.

“About that… Erebor was planned with the intention of making it difficult for everyone who is not a dwarf to get where they wanted to. My ancestors didn’t want elves to be able to find the treasury without problems… or anything at all, really. It is an advantage if elvish delegations need to be accompanied at all times. And it is rather entertaining.” Thorin grinned.

Bilbo stared at him. “And you didn’t think to tell me this before now?”

Thorin’s grin froze on his face at the tone in Bilbo’s voice. “I… You fit in so well with us that it didn’t even occur to me that it might be a problem. I only remembered when Fíli mentioned that you keep getting lost. I have something for you that might help.”

Thorin took a piece of parchment out of a small pouch lying on their make-shift table. 

“Ori found an old layout plan of Erebor in what remained of the library. I asked him to trace it for you and together with Glóin and Bombur, he added in where the cave-ins are and which bridges have collapsed. The pouch is my little contribution.”

Bilbo looked at the map. In small but tidy writing, all the halls and areas in Erebor were labeled. The map itself was incredibly detailed, showing statues, steps and even the smallest nooks and crannies. 

“Thank you! It is incredible! I think I might actually stop getting lost with this,” Bilbo said.

Thorin beamed.

Bilbo spotted something on the map and wrinkled his forehead. “What is this?” he asked, pointing at a combination of geometric shapes.

“We still don’t want to risk having elves finding their way around Erebor,” Thorin replied. “But I thought we should have some signs to help you nonetheless, so I had Dwalin and Óin chisel these into the walls these past couple of days. With your aptitude for languages and writing, it shouldn’t take too long before you know them and the map has them labeled.” Thorin pointed at the little legend in the corner.

“This is absolutely amazing, thank you!” Bilbo said, giving Thorin a long kiss.

“I hope it helps,” Thorin said, when they finally broke the kiss.

“It will, I’m sure of it,” Bilbo said, kissing Thorin again.

“Shouldn’t you leave for your meeting with Bofur and Bombur?” Thorin asked eventually, sounding rather reluctant to have Bilbo go.

Bilbo laughed. “Don’t worry, I only have to be there in two hours. I may have calculated some additional time for getting lost, but now I don’t need that.”

Thorin gently kissed Bilbo’s forehead. “I just wish you had said something earlier. You know I’m the last person to criticise someone for getting lost.”


End file.
